MANY CONFUSE OBSESSION AND ATTACHMENT WITH LOVE BUT SHOULD KNOW THAT TRUE LOVE LEADS TO A LIGHT IN WHICH THERE IS NO SADNESS

Never confuse over-attachment with love. There's a huge difference.

To be over-attached is to cling. To over-attach is to obsess. To over-attach is to narrow one's vision so that another person or an object is in the center of our thoughts, instead of God.

To over-attach is to think the world revolves around a person or thing, or place, or career and can inhibit your journey to Christ.

To over-attach is to believe that when we lose whatever it is that we are overly attached to, the world will end.

To be over-attached is sometimes mistaken for loyalty and fidelity as well as love -- and those who are overly attached may have those good characteristics (in fact, most frequently do). But to be over-attached (person-centric, instead of Christ-centric) can be devastating.

Many are those who are obsessively close to a husband or wife and or boyfriend or girlfriend "can't live without" that person and yet may not really love quite to the extent that they project.

At least, they are not loving in a healthy way. Now, that doesn't mean every person who is overly attached to another does not actually love the person; the two emotions most often overlap. It just means they have to be careful not to make themselves into a "nation of two," exclusive of all else, or to idolize one another -- excluding Christ.

We are to love as deeply as we can, and everyone we can -- and especially those close to us -- but not in a fashion that shows imbalance.

When we do that, we live a life filled with fear of losing the object of our attachment. The Bible says that fear comes when our love is imperfect ("perfect love casts out all fear"), and so if there is fear attached to a relationship there is an imperfection. There is especially an imperfection if we are obsessed. This happens frequently during boyfriend-girlfriend breakups.

It shows lack of faith because when we are over-attached, it often indicates that we really aren't sure we will see the person again in eternity (as we will, unless one is condemned).

Every single person we have ever known will be on the other side -- and we will be reunited not only with relatives we knew but probably ancestors back to Adam.

We don't die alone. We will be escorted by spirits who know us -- whether departed or angels -- as we head for Jesus.

How many times in your life have you feared something, only to find out there really had been nothing to worry about? How many times have you been too apprehensive to do something that would have expanded your joy or experience or knowledge -- fearful for no reason? How many times have you avoided a trip because you were overly attached to a person or even to your home?

When we die, over-attachment (especially to material objects) can inhibit our journey to the Light. Love properly. Let not a bond become bondage. We see the extreme in those so attached to everything material they own that they hoard objects such that they cannot even move around their homes.

It is the judgment of men that often makes us over-attached because we are trained that this is the way to show affection.

We live in an obsessive culture.

But we do not have to partake of it.

As the great classic Imitation of Christ (quoting Jesus) said:

"My son, you will not take it to heart, though some people think or say of you evil that you would gladly not hear, for you will think even worse of yourself, and that no man is as evil as you. If you are well-ordered in your soul, you will not care much for such flying words. It is no little wisdom for a man to keep himself in silence and in good peace when evil words are spoken to him, and to turn his heart to God and not to be troubled with man's judgment."

Are those who mourn for years over a loved one doing so out of love or because they are lacking Jesus?

Sadness? We all go through this. And we may feel sorrow for years, over the memory, for example, of a deceased loved one. That's normal.

But we must always keep in mind that we live forever and will see the person again in a radiance beyond earthly radiance in a place where living waters sprout in a sea of fountains or run in channels lined with what looks like transparent gold in a place of mysterious trees that have no dead limbs and are symmetrical with buildings that rise far beyond the skyscrapers of New York.

That is heaven, and in its light, there is no sadness.

[Michael Brown retreat, Milwaukee: spiritual warfare, afterlife]

[resources: The Other Side]